Doing things by yourself is scary. Like really scary. And yet, for some crazy reason, in the past six months, I traveled to Bali alone. I got tattoos alone. I went on romantic hikes along the California coast alone. I drank a lot of cold brew in coffee shops alone. I don't regret any of my solo outings but, did I always want to do them alone? No. Heck no. I would be lying if I said that I always had fun hanging out by myself. I usually have a 15 minute “YOU ARE DOING THIS. YOU ARE REALLY DOING THIS. STOP FREAKING OUT” pep talk before every adventure I go on.
So besides pep talks, how in the world do you do things alone? Here are two big ideas that get me in the right mindset:
1. Acknowledge your fear
You’re always going to be scared doing things alone. Always. I still feel a little bit scared every time I venture out of my hotel room into a foreign city for the first time. Stepping out of your comfort zone is never easy. The cool thing is that if you know you are going to be scared then what are you really scared about? It's normal to have fears. It's normal to fear the unknown. Instead of letting that fear cripple you, let it inspire you.
Create a plan. Prepare for your solo adventure. Afraid of eating out alone? Bring reading materials along and pick a seat with a view of the street (ample opportunity to spot cute dogs). Afraid of talking to strangers? Study up on conversation starting questions. It’s simple. The more prepared you are, the less scared you will be. And the less scared you are, the more courage you will find to do almost anything alone.
2. Assume the best
Stop thinking that you are going to look stupid or weird. Instead of assuming that you will be miserable and lonely doing ___ alone, expect the best. Stop worrying about what other people think of you. I promise you, no one is going to think you are a loner with no friends. They are going to think you are brave, awesome, and adventurous for doing something on your own. A positive mindset can change your whole perspective.
Need some more inspiration?
This video can help you gain some confidence
My favorite blog for solo travel destinations
One of my favorite books about a woman walking across Australia alone